Thank you for purchasing Gintama 34!
I think you guys are starting to find the hype about the upcoming movie annoying these days in Japan, so I won’t mention it at all! I won’t even write the “M” in the word “movie”, and to the movie staff I say: don’t think everyone can keep flattering you forever by talking about the movie! How dare you allow yourself to be interviewed by Quick Japan magazine posing as a protagonist? What is the interview between directors Fujita and Takamatsu? I should be interviewed too, you idiots! I should get a good interview too, you fools! Why interview the former and current editors, Onishi, Saito and Nakasaki?! They should contact me, damn idiots! They should flatter me more, you bloody idiots! Besides, what does “The new interpretation of the Benizakura saga” mean? They’re putting on airs by putting such a title when it’s just a rehash of an already published story. It would be enough to reread the volumes! Why is it necessary to pay more? What is…? Is this film worth seeing just because new scenes have been added? No way! They just tacked on new scenes at random… what? Thanks to the collaboration of Hideaki Sorachi, the author of the original work, the new scenes fit together well? No way… with the excuse of the meeting, I was just throwing up in a pub! Why would I offer them my help…? Their screenplay was so perfect that I didn’t need to… It was convenient, since it was accompanied by a short film… how should I put it… I think that even people who’ve already followed that saga will be able to enjoy it… What?! I’m not praising the movie at all! I-I don’t like it at all! And I have nothing to do with it! I’ve got my circle activities, and also I’m making my friends wait… So I’m leaving!
CONTACT WITH THE READERS: QUESTION CORNER 89
QUESTION FROM MR. “NEWLY AWAKENED SERIOUS AMANTO” OF GUNMA PROVINCE
I’ve always cared about this fact: if Gin-san and Katsura work so hard, why is Takasugi sitting on a pleasure boat with a cabin? I can’t stop thinking about it, so tell me why!
ANSWER:
He gets money by forcing his followers to do evil deeds. By the way, he’s a rich kid who grew up in a wealthy family.
CONTACT WITH THE READERS: QUESTION CORNER 90
QUESTION FROM MR. “I ONLY LICK LOLLIPOPS BOUGHT FROM A CHEAP SNACK SHOP”, FROM KUMAMOTO PROVINCE
Good morning, Dancer Sorachi sensei! The other day I played kabaddi with my friend Yokoyama, but since we couldn’t understand the rules, we stopped right away. Then I thought about it for three days and three nights, but I couldn’t understand the game. Please explain to me how it works!
ANSWER:
ON THE FOURTH DAY YOU WILL SUCCEED.
Volume 34 special, “I don’t like the movie at all…”, ends here.
I apologize for all this publicity! Seriously, this is the last time, I won’t do it again, so forgive me! From the next volume, an indifferent, sour and rocking Gintama will be back, who won’t advertise neither the anime nor the movie, because it doesn’t give them any importance and it’s satisfied only if the monographic volumes sell well! Keep that in mind!
Except that the movie is also very rockin’, so I guess it’s irresistible to you rock ‘n’ rollers… I’m not telling you to watch it, but at least pay the ticket to the cinema and go out after spitting in their faces! You can even buy gadgets and then hurl them at a wall! Whatever it is, spend a lot of money, just get it to me! There’s the rock!
At least I think so…
New topic: “Rock will never die.”
Yorozuya Shinigami 